Weddings!
The pastor and people of St. Matthew's Anglican Church are delighted for your interest in celebrating your marriage in the Church. We hope the conversations you share and the liturgy we celebrate will add to the joy and solemnity of your wedding and help make your marriage a living symbol of the union between Christ and his Church. The following information is designed to help you on your journey. Welcome!
Christian Marriage And Weddings
Christian marriage is a solemn and public covenant between a man and a woman in the presence of God. The bond and covenant of marriage was established by God in creation, and our Lord Jesus Christ adorned this manner of life by his presence and first miracle at a wedding in Cana of Galilee. It is a Sacramental Rite signifying to us the mystery of the union between God and his Church, and Holy Scripture commends it to be honored among all people.
We believe this life-long journey of husband and wife in heart, body, and mind is intended by God for three reasons:
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the mutual joy of the couple
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the help and comfort they give one another in good times and in bad
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when it is to be, for the procreation of children and their nurture in the knowledge and love of the Lord
Therefore marriage is not to be entered into unadvisedly or lightly, but reverently, deliberately, and in accordance with the purposes for which it was instituted by God.
Weddings are the liturgical way we celebrate and bless Christian marriages. The careful preparation couples engage in with their parish priest is the way we at St. Matthew's Church honor this sacred covenant.
Preparation
The first step for those who want to celebrate their marriage at St. Matthew's is to become members that are actively involved in the life of the parish. The single best thing we can do to honor and foster this life-long union is to provide a warm, friendly and solid church home that enriches peoples' spiritual lives.
It is important that the bride and groom arrange to talk with the Rector several months before the anticipated wedding date and before any other arrangements for the wedding are made. Such timely notice will help ensure that the Rector and the parish facilities are available and that Canon law -- which requires a time of instruction, and consent of the Bishop in cases of remarriage after divorce -- is fulfilled. This time of preparation, known to our parish as "Celebration through Conversation," involves at least five meetings between the Rector and the couple and six or more months of prayer, conversation and study prior to the wedding.
The Service
A wedding service in an Anglican Church is very much like a Sunday celebration of the Holy Eucharist. The service includes an opening prayer, bible readings and a sermon. The congregation prays. We celebrate the central act of Christian worship, Holy Communion.
A congregation that gathers for a wedding is a unique collection of people. Never again will this exact same group of people gather for worship and prayer. The wedding is not only a time for them to celebrate the marriage of a man and a woman; it is a time for them to discover and celebrate God who is alive and well and active in all our lives.
Decorations
There is a wide variety of wedding decorations, and decisions about them are dictated by many considerations. As you make arrangements, keep in mind that the Celebration and Blessing of a Marriage is a liturgy of the Church which calls for simplicity and beauty.
The color of the Altar frontal and other hangings used for weddings is white, the liturgical color for incarnation and resurrection, and the same color used at Christmas, Easter and other high holy days. Traditionally, the bride, the groom, or one of their families provides the Altar flowers for the wedding and leave them for use at the next parish Eucharist. If a unity candle is used, the couple usually provides this. The parish provides Altar candles.
Music
Music for the liturgy is determined by the bride, groom, Rector and any musicians used. In addition to any other music desired, at least two hymns are generally sung by the entire congregation. The Book of Common Prayer will be helpful in determining appropriate music and its placement in the service. It may be possible for members of one or more of our parish choirs to be involved in the service to add to the beauty and richness of the event.
Rehearsal
A date and time for the wedding rehearsal will be determined by the Rector, the bride and the groom. All participants in the service are expected to attend the rehearsal and to be on time. The rehearsal will last no longer than 45 minutes.
Please present the marriage license to the officiating priest or the parish secretary the day before the rehearsal.
Fees
There is no fee required for the use of the parish facilities themselves or for the clergy. People often make a donation to the Rector's Discretionary Fund which is used to help the needy and for other un-budgeted ministry expenses. Some people also make a special donation to the parish itself in support of its mission and ministry.
Pictures And Videos
A wedding is a festive and special occasion, and most couples want some pictorial remembrance of the event. Because the ceremony should be marked by dignity and solemnity, there are a few guidelines each couple -- and their photographers -- need to know. Except during the entrance and closing processions, flash photos may not be taken during the liturgy. Photographers and video recording artists are asked to not walk through the church during the service. They may discretely station themselves at the back of the church.
Taking family and group pictures at the Altar after the ceremony is discouraged for several reasons. This always takes more time than estimated while guests are left waiting. Also it delays the sexton and the Altar guild who need to prepare the church for the next service. We recommend the following:
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Take one picture each of the bride and of the groom alone at the Altar before the service.
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Take one picture of the bride and groom together at the Altar after the service.
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Take one picture of the bride, groom, and liturgical ministers at the Altar after the service (if desired).
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Take all other pictures, i.e. attendants, families, other group shots, at the reception.
Receptions
It is strongly recommended that if a receiving line is desired it be held at the entrance to the reception.
If you wish to use the parish facilities for a reception, please inform the Rector as soon as possible. Wine, beer and/or champagne may be served provided that:
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Non-alcoholic beverages are also provided.
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No attempt is made to make drinking alcohol a social requirement.
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Food is served.
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The bride and groom take personal responsibility for the safe travel of all guests.
Have fun, and pray often for God's blessing on your union